She wears my ring … Forever (Part 1)

Published October 8, 2013 by Kappaloca

A few months ago I went on a road trip with a very very special friend.

She expressed the need for just taking the road and going somewhere she had never been. I suggested a few places down the Coastline and she  asked me to join her. She had recently lost her husband and I was still enjoying my new found “freedom”. (The ability to go away for a few days and not come home to a drunk, aggressive man)

We  set off on a Journey to no where. Just the two of us in a Country where anything is possible. The land of Milk and Honey where the sea flows into the rivers and the sea sand is snow white. We stopped wherever we wanted to. We ate what we wanted, when we wanted without a care in the world.  The best thing we did was buying a piping hot loaf of bread and crispy baked Chips at a Portuguese Fisheries shop and stuff it into the hollowed out bread with farm butter that melted into it. we laughed and listened to shitty music. Let our hair down and just behaved like idiots. We camped at the most awkward places and got up at 4am in the morning to have Coffee and wait for the sun to come up.  Got drunk at a Beach side Resort all on our own. (well I did, she does not drink) Fed the seagulls and showered in the nude. We had the whole camp site to ourselves.

The last part of our journey we were constantly being sent sms messages by a “friend” who she only knew from Social Media. He invited us to come and stay at his place right on the seaside. He made it clear that he would let us have the house for the weekend and would not interfere with us. We took a chance and went to meet this guy. From the moment he met us, he only had eyes for her. They stayed up all night and talked. Just talked about anything and everything. Lots of laughter and lots of jokes.

What was the most fantastic times of our life soon had to end as we had homes and lives to return to.

In less than a week he convinced her to return and spend more time with him. She fell head over heels in love with a man she met briefly and only chatted to occasionally on Social Media.

And so Begins the real story: 

After a mere 3 months they got engaged. I was the first person to be notified and was thrilled for them, but had also asked her if things were not moving along way too fast. He drank and was very attached to his parents who lived just up the road. He was a Momma’s Boy. He had to see them every single day of his life. Before work or after work, but he had to see them. He’s Mom always sent messages and little parcels home. She got phone calls from his mother telling her to remember the way he liked things. On occasion they would not be home and on their return she would find the dishes done or the furniture that she had moved, back in their old settings. Empty Booze Bottles would disappear by themselves. (She removed it) He would start a verbal war about stupid things like his remote control not showing in a certain direction on the side table or the toilet paper that was turning down in the wrong direction.

Are these not setting off any Lightning Bolts and red Flags???

She could not start her car and drive to the shop as he would within minutes phone her from his work place and ask where she was going as he was phoned by someone who told him they saw her car.

The first time she left was over a trivial stupid incident. She just got in her car and drove back to her own Sanctuary. From the moment he knew she had left, the phone calls and sms messages and promises started. He tried to rope me in asking me to convince her to go back to him and that he would change. After 4 days she went back.

The drinking got worse. The fighting got worse. He accused her of anything and everything. She was a whore. She was Fat. She stank. She did not know how to cook, She was a tattle tail who carried stories to his mother, she was lazy, she could not cook like his mother, she did not know how to speak, she was not worth fucking. She slept with every man she had listed on her phone.

She had to clean up her social media pages and thin out her contacts. He had security Cameras around the house so he could always see when anybody approached the house. He works shifts and when he is on night duty he drinks until a certain time of the day, she then draws his bath and has to either sit with him whilst he is in the bath or get in the bath with him. He takes a few hours sleep and she has to stay in bed with him.  When he get up and gets ready for work she packs him a meal and a few treats to see him through the night, but at 1 am. in the morning when they have their break he comes home to check on her and take a shit as he refuses to use the toilets at work. She has to be awake and alert until he leaves.  The first thing he does when he walks into the house in the mornings is pour himself a glass of liquor, as by the time he has started shaking like  leaf.

One day I received a call from her to say they are on their way as they are coming to get married here in her Home town.

This is not even 6 months into the relationship!!!

Watch this Space a s I bring you more of this extremely sad story. ……….As it gets worse.

Thank you for reading.

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2 comments on “She wears my ring … Forever (Part 1)

  • Oh my God… So many warning signs. I had many of these warning signs and ignored them, always thinking that the drinking will stop and he would change… I will be praying for your friend….

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